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Do Your Children See You Give?
Every parent wants to raise children who share and give generously. When
our children someday meet God face to face we want to know that they
will hear Jesus say to them the same words the master said to those who
used their talents wisely, “Well done, my good and faithful
servant...Come, share your master’s joy.” (Matt 25:21)
However, raising a generous child is a challenge in a society that
constantly teaches children to want more and more things for themselves.
One of the key factors in teaching children to be generous is to let
them see you giving. After all, children mimic what they see, not what
they hear. Today many donations to the church may be made
electronically, monthly, quarterly, or via mail. Thus, children may
never actually see their parents give. A child who never sees a parent
place an envelope in the Offering could grow up thinking, “My parents
never gave any support to the Church. Why should I?” Therefore, it is
important that parents talk with children about the charitable gifts the
family makes. If you would like to increase your giving you might even
ask your kids about ways the family budget could be adjusted so that
there is more to share with God. Their suggestions might surprise you!
We all know that money can’t buy happiness. Wealthy people can be just
as unhappy as poorer people. Rather, happiness comes from being content
with what we have and feeling like we are making a difference in the
world. We can put our children on the path to a happy and successful
life by teaching them how to use and manage money so that it brings them
contentment, fills their needs and allows them to help others.
Financial experts suggest that children should be taught to divide their
allowance into three or four sections – to spend, to save, to invest and
to donate. Spending covers basic needs and wants. Saving teaches
patience and planning. Investing looks to the future. For children this
might mean future educational needs. Donating gives kids satisfaction by
allowing them to be a part of sometime important, like the Offering.
Our Lord calls each of us to share what we have. He tells us, “Much will
be required of the person entrusted with much and even more will be
demanded of the person entrusted with more.” (Luke 12:48) Children who
learn to give away a portion of their financial blessings not only are
following the Lord’s command but they also begin to discover that
sharing part of their money can be very satisfying.
Children's Stewardship
Today, many churches and parents give very little thought to children’s
stewardship. Yet, new thinking throughout the charitable world is
reinforcing the importance of childhood giving. Research confirms that
if a person does not learn to give as a child he or she is less likely
to give as an adult. Here’s a new look at some of the old concerns about
children’s giving.
The point of a children’s giving program is not how much the kids give.
The point is to teach them the joy and fulfillment that comes from
giving. Keep in mind that giving typically only happens after all of our
own perceived needs are met. Some people have very long lists of
perceived needs. Generous people often have fewer perceived needs.
Today, in our extremely materialistic society – which currently bombards
kids with over 3,000 advertising messages a day and 23 million
advertising messages by the time a child reaches the age of 21 – young
people are growing up with the idea that they need EVERYTHING. If we
don’t also teach them the stewardship message – which we all need to
give something back to God – they can spend a frustrating lifetime
pursuing their own endless material wants and never really embrace the
Gospel call to share the blessings God has entrusted to their care
If parents are the ones worrying about the donation, you have missed the
whole point of the program. The idea is to teach children the joy and
the responsibility of giving. Thus, the child should be making his or
her own gift. A dime or a quarter from a child’s own heart is much more
valuable than $5 from a parent’s wallet. When properly explained to
parents, a children’s giving program should be seen by parents as a way
to help children get their priorities in order and overcome the constant
self-centeredness of our society. Parents should appreciate knowing that
children who learn to give will be more satisfied and happier adults.
Will Our Children Be Stewards?
The occasion was a vestry meeting to write a stewardship statement. The
group was completing a discussion of early memories of money in which
the final portion, that devoted to early memories of money as an
offering, had been particularly lively and I couldn’t help commenting.
“You seem to have really enjoyed talking about these memories of giving
offerings as children. Tell me, what do the children in this
congregation now do about offering?” There was a sudden silence which
became filled with embarrassment as it continued. Finally, one quiet
voice responded with a mixture of realization and regret, “Nothing, I
guess. I really hadn’t thought about it until now.”
As we talked, members of that vestry realized that in their congregation
there was no Sunday School offering collected. Children left the worship
service as soon as the gospel had been read and returned in time to
follow the presentation of the offering, the bread and the wine down the
aisle. There was literally no opportunity for them to participate in any
offering at all!
The good news is that that situation changed for those children on the
very next Sunday. The vestry member who also served as the primary
children’s Sunday School teacher invited her students to talk about
offering and create their own offering box in which to begin placing
their gifts. Now, that box is placed on top of the worship offering and
presented at the altar each Sunday by one of the children. The priest
leaves the offering on the altar until the conclusion of the Eucharist
and the children see their box sitting there when they come to the altar
rail. The children have also selected outreach projects funded by “the
children’s offering.”
“What are we teaching our children about stewardship?” is becoming a
critical question for our church. The fact is that we are teaching them
very little. The baby boomers whose parents passed out nickels, dimes,
and quarters for childish hands to place in offering places are not
passing that instruction along.
Why does it matter? Listen to a few stewardship witness talks. “My
parents taught me to tithe” is a common beginning. How many of our
children could say that? If we are not careful, we will soon have a
generation of gospel consumers who have not been formed to contribute
something of their own substance to the proclamation of that gospel to
the world.
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